Experience
11/26/2008
01:18

I want to be angry
Maybe even hate you
But how can I do that
When all you did is try to love me
And all I've had the chance
Is to experience a life with you
For a short while

I want to kick myself
Maybe even hate myself
For not noticing all these signs
The past 13 months
You had to literally get down on your knees
Just to tell me I was so blind
Maybe I just couldn't imagine

I can't understand why someone like you
Could want a woman like me
All the darkness, but then there's the brighter side of me
"Everything has purpose, Jesus led me here for you"
I think I can believe that, though it's hard
But if that's what you believe than I'll accept
And just be thankful

I wish I could be angry at you
And say "why did you do this to me?"
It'd be so much easier to find someone else
If you weren't so wonderful
I wish I could say I didn't know what this meant
Spending all that time with you
But for once in my life I went into something
With both my eyes wide open

All that rambling talk about commitment
Four little words would do
Admit you want to be with someone like me
So what if I'm liberal, so what if I'm half your age
So what if I'd rather marry a woman
We're not a different species
No one can choose who they love

I can act stupid, like I didn't know
What was going to happen
But I knew the moment I got there
That I would commit my life to you
I was scared, but I took a deep breath
And I said "I'm happy when I'm with you"
And now that's all that matters

Now some people hate me
But I really don't care
This is between you and me
Eventually it would happen anyways
So I'm not really worried
Someone said "You would have worked it out.
Don't worry, nothing else matters when both of you are happy."

I want to be angry
For this huge commitment I made
This experience that will change my life
For better or for worse
You told me that night not to worry
That you'd be the first to go
Maybe I won't live that long
But I got to experience a friend like you

Comments:
 
nisheedhi   nisheedhi wrote
on 12/13/2008 11:29:56 PM
the thoughts are truly touching

BIDDIXGIRL   BIDDIXGIRL wrote
on 12/13/2008 3:25:23 AM
This really touched the heart. Words that make you feel love, pain, confusion all at the same time. Good writing! Biddixgirl

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"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment."
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