Turning over a new leaf

How do you endure

a life that is so obscure

or is it that you prefer

something so indelibly selectably unpure?

in the process i exclaim

a name forever to remain

the ability i contain

to see way beyond the plane

you could never pick my brain

a prophet and a scholar

treading upon the waters

to reach the sons and the daughters

my bloodline is distilled

unlocking secrets once concealed

due time all will be revealed

as I spread my seed amongst the field

shed light beyond the bright

my candle forever burn

my fire is unquenchable

to whomever this may concern

however you may discern

willing to die for my belief

ressurected as if im lazerus

gripping at the stem of my leaf


Comments:
 
StarPoet   StarPoet wrote
on 4/26/2011 6:57:03 PM
Another flow masterpiece. The only thing I would maybe change is the "As I spread my seed amongt the field" for one may look at you as a chronic babymaker. Maybe "As I look into life's field" or "As I grow my seed in life's field" for that tells you are raising a child. I also thought the Lazarus line was wayyy cool. Not trying to be critical, just trying to maybe help you to be better, for you have word talent that I wish I had.

Trenchtownrock   Trenchtownrock wrote
on 2/22/2011 11:38:00 AM
Full of life and spirits walking back to life..strong write.

phonetics   phonetics wrote
on 2/20/2011 3:23:20 AM
No thank you. Very well apreciated

Angeleyez   Angeleyez wrote
on 2/19/2011 7:51:06 PM
this is really good! i definitely enjoyed reading this thank you.

phonetics
Poetry
Free Verse
writing phonetics
G.O.A.T.
Bookmark and Share

You must log in to rate.
Rating: 9.0/10

© 2014 WritingRoom.com, LLC. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
WRITING | POETRY WRITING | CREATIVE WRITING | WRITE A BOOK | WRITING CONTESTS | WRITING TIPS