No direction home

IM NOT SURE WHERE I AM GOING
BECAUSE I DONT KNOW WHERE IM AT
NO DIRECTION HOME
SO VERY FAR FROM THAT
THAT PLACE WE CALL HOME
IS A PLACE I NEVER SEEN
MY HOME ISNT ON EARTH
I WAS SENT FROM A HIGHER BEING
NOTHING MORE THAN A SPIRIT
I WEAR A PROTECTIVE SHELL
IN THE FORM OF A BODY
FLEEEING THE DEPTHS OF HELL
CAN YOU HEAR ME NOW?
YOU LISTEN BUT DO NOT HEAR
SO WHEN I APPEAR AS A LIGHT
HAVE THE COURAGE NOT 2 FEAR
THOSE THAT THINK YOU KNOW ME
IM NOT WHO YOU THINK I AM
A BULL AMONG CALVES
WITH A HEAD HARDER THAN A RAM
A DIVINE ENTITY PEAKING
SLOWLY THE SECRETS ARE LEAKING
THE ABILITY 2 CAPTURE MINDS
WITHOUT EVEN SPEAKING
LIVE WITHOUT REGRET
THE MIND SEEMS 2 FORGET
ANYTHING THAT IS UNIMPORTANT
THE EXORCISM OF RETROSPECT
SO HERE I STAND ALONE
THE CHILD THAT HELD HIS OWN
HERE I START MY PILGRAMAGE
WITH NO DIRECTION HOME


Comments:
 
Ve   Ve wrote
on 8/3/2009 7:08:03 AM
Well freddy is clearly an aethiest I will admit that I don't get this poem as much as thothers. I still liked it and I always love the bounce. I want to get a little trampoline in my office and jump while I read it. Sometimes art is not in the message but the words. You rhyme beautifully and it flows perfectly. Boom Boom Bounce!

frederic   frederic wrote
on 7/14/2009 12:40:36 PM
I can only understand this if you see yourself as a Christ figure because you are asserting yourself to be doing the will of God, albeit a confused will. I don't blame you for being overly mystified. Man isn't doing the will of God.

Trenchtownrock   Trenchtownrock wrote
on 7/12/2009 8:00:20 PM
You are on your way to doing big things my friend...the fact that you wrote makes you a writer. Never fall prey to the know it all who sit in a classroom wanting the masses to prescribe to what they believe good writing is. I love the depth of this piece and the fact that I can feel your soul in these words..write with strength and nonconformity.

StarPoet   StarPoet wrote
on 7/9/2009 2:31:22 AM
Not bad. You touched on some good points with some of the sentences (the first 4 made me think). But you kinda jumped around with some points/subjects and lost me some. I think if you redo parts of this and refocus those parts along the lines of "no direction" then you would have quite a good poem here. Don't take offense, just trying to help for that is why we are here. I took some great advice from a young lady here and it made my poem "On A Summer's Day" much, much better!

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Synopsis
I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THIS POEM MEANS I JUST WRITE WHAT COMES 2 MY MIND. CONSTRUCTIVE CRITISM PLEASE I NEED 2 KNOW IF I HAVE A FUTURE AS A WRITER.
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