Letting Go

Letting Go

By: Kayla Meyers

For so long I was too blind
Consumed by my love for you
Scarred by passion
I’m not saying you abused me
But you might as well have
The hurt was just as bad
My desire for you distorted the truth
Gave me rose-colored glasses
Impairing my ability to see you for what you really are
In my mind I made you perfect
The picture of Heaven was nothing compared to your beauty
As much as I wanted you to care
The fact is that you don’t
You never have
And probably never will
I could have given my life up, Just to give it to you
But you still would’ve looked past me
As for me?
I would have forgiven and forgotten all the pain
And still admired you for what I wished you could be
“I love you” became cliché
“I need you” was irrelevant
These words only small glimpses of what I felt
Just for you
Nothing else mattered to me
All I thought of was how to get to you
For just one night
A glance
A kiss
Maybe you just didn’t want to see it
Or maybe it just didn’t matter to you
You don’t care about anything I’ve gone through
The lies, the hurt, the blame
Those things meant nothing
Now all I have is a ghost
A memory of what I wanted so badly to be there
The dust has settled, the fog has cleared
And I see the picture so much better now
Not what I want to be there
But was really is
I’m not quite sure now why I gave up so much
Why I let you control me
But I do know one thing
Years from now you’ll look back on me
And finally understand what you did
You’ll want to find me
But I won’t be there
Too many tears were shed on your behalf
Too many sleepless nights chasing your memory away
Someday those things will mean something to you
But for once
You’ll mean nothing to me


danicpa68   danicpa68 wrote
on 4/23/2008 8:24:03 PM
It's great that you were able to express yourself during this difficult time. I'm sure it was very therapeutic. Your poetry invokes such feeling.

writing kayla97068
There is a balance of life; for every positive there will be a negative, and with every negative soon will come a positive. If you hold on long enough through all the bad, you'll be able to find something wonderful and cherish it all that much more.
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Rating: 10.0/10

I was fourteen when I wrote this and just coming out of possibly the most paramount, tumultuous "relationship" I've ever been in. This was my way of releasing all the pain I was going through, and as means to gain closure for myself as it was blatantly clear I would not be getting it from him. It's rather interesting because this was intended for one person, yet a few years later I became involved with someone who this would apply to as well.
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