If you drop an eaves and no one hears it….


I’ll admit it; I’m the world’s foremost eavesdropper when I can get a chance to do it right. It’s no fun listening to people on the phone and that sort of thing, although at one time that was a real sport. Back in the day of “Party Lines” you would listen in on your neighbor’s conversations. Those were the days before the phone companies had lines everywhere, and they would run out into the boonies, and several families would get hooked up to the same line.  Forbidden to do so, we kids would listen in on our neighbor’s conversations, not realizing what a dull lot they were, and especially since no one in their right mind would say anything worth repeating over a phone line (some things have not changed). Once my sister and I were sneaking an audio peek at the neighbor’s conversation when they started talking about our grandparents trading us in for livestock.  They could hear us breathing, or something like that, but we freaked out over the idea what we were going to get traded off.  We ran screaming and crying to our grandmother, and confessed what we had heard. Damn sadistic neighbors.


Again, with phones, the first handheld mobile phones had a tendency to cross pollinate with other handheld mobile phones.  At Tall Tree Apartments in Valdosta Georgia, a person could sit at the pool with a mobile phone, and get calls from a dozen different sets.  The best we got out of that one, however, was discovering that one of the guys we knew was seeing a High School girl. Both parties lived at Tall Tree. He was twenty, she was seventeen, but that was still enough to cause parent problems. I couldn’t see it. She was pretty, smart, and seemed nice enough, and he was a total dweeb. Go figure.


I know it was Christmas, or near enough to it to count, because I was wearing my Santa Hat. Every year, a week or so before Christmas, I wear a Santa Hat. Yeah, it’s truly weird, especially for me, but it makes Christmas people smile at me, makes kids smile at me, and all for wearing a hat, for two weeks out of the year, the rest of society fully loves me. All of the hat, yea.


But I digress.



I was sitting in a fast food restaurant committing culinary hari-kari when the teenagers behind me started talking about a party they had gone to the weekend before. Someone’s parents had gone out of town, and they really threw down.  They had this game where they drew a girl’s name from a hat, and a guy’s name from a hat, and the two had to go make out in a closet for ten minutes. They had started out trying to trick couple into making out in a closet that had a hidden camera inside, but the couple invariably turned the light off. That got someone thinking very bad thoughts. They told some chick a guy she really liked was in the closet, and told some guy there was a girl he liked inside, and they already had the light out.  After ten minutes the happy couple come out and SURPRISE! They’re siblings.


I sprayed Pepsi all over my damn table.



Of course I had to get up and join them after this, and they thought it was hysterical. Apparently the two had a pretty good time until the lights came back on, and the guy involved was still in a murderous rage. Rumor had it they got very involved but no one really believed that part of the story.


Can you imagine if the camera would have been on, and it would have hit You Tube?


Take Care,


StarPoet   StarPoet wrote
on 6/11/2008 4:39:57 AM
Funny as hell Mike. I had tears in my eyes on this one. Very good one, man!!!!!

Mike Firesmith   Mike Firesmith wrote
on 6/9/2008 7:39:54 PM
No, but I sure would like to!!!!!!!

penname   penname wrote
on 6/9/2008 7:15:17 PM
those hat were out way before Santa, lol.

penname   penname wrote
on 6/9/2008 7:14:24 PM
but have you listened to the neighbors arguing on thier two/three way baby monitor that picks up on your home land line?

Mike Firesmith
Special Interest
writing Mike Firesmith
I write
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