Confusion
The first time he heard the word he was just a child. The meaning of it confused him even then. How could one word mean two things that were different at the same time?
Some people mostly older said the word meant to be happy. They pointed it out in the old songs at church or in the dialogue of movies in black and white that they watched. You could also find the word used in old books.
Children his age didn’t help him understand the word either, they seemed just as confused as the adults. Girls only giggled when you spoke the word to them. If you called another boy by the word they got angry and tried to punch you. Or they yelled the word right back at you and tried to get you to fight them over it.
People his parents age confused him the most when they talked about the word. They said it used to mean something else but now it meant a different thing. It was a way people were and there was nothing wrong with being that way but it was also something people didn’t talk about and it made them nervous.