The Dalai Lama - Ask Jay #15
  

Dalai Lama: Peaceful, or Wolf in Llama’s Skin?

Ask Jay #15

 

QUESTION:  The Chinese government is saying all these horrible things about the Dalai Lama, but isn’t he supposed to be some Asian-Mother-Teresa figure?  Different religion but isn’t it the same idea? – Rick in MY

 

Well Rick, what you say is true.  The Chinese government has been making out the Dalai Lama to be the next Osama.  Truth or fiction, why ask an expert when Ask Jay has all the answers?

 

The Dalai Lama, who I will periodically refer to as The Great DL, is the reincarnation of the Buddha (or Bodhisattva, the young Buddha still working towards complete enlightenment) according to the Tibetan Buddhist religion.  He teaches (and this is according to wikpedia, so it has to be true) nonviolence, meditation, non-extremism, moderation, and overcoming greed, hatred, and delusion.  These are obviously the characteristics of a terror inducing, cold-blooded organizer of death and destruction.  Come on!  Just look at Buddha, he’s the Asian Santa Clause – a jolly fat man who’s always smiling.  The Great DL organizing violence is about as likely as St. Nick spiking the elves’ eggnog with PCP and handing them AK-47’s to start the invasion of Canada (his arch-nemesis).

 

The Great DL is obviously the target of a smear campaign that rivals that of American Politics.  In fact, I’m willing to bet China and Hilary are sharing notes out of the same playbook while the Dalai Lama and Obama sit in the back of the room thinking “this sucks” because they can’t return fire without losing credibility. 

 

If the Dalai Lama is in fact a terrorist mastermind we should be praying that Osama starts sending the Lama all his new recruits for training.  They could start some AK-47 to Enlightenment exchange program.  Need an idea for an ad campaign? “Feeling a strange and insatiable urge to sacrifice your own life for your cause?  Why walk into a crowded market with a bomb strapped to your chest when you could just walk up to the embassy and set yourself on fire in political protest?”  Imagine the anti-terrorism task forces around the world trading in their guns for fire extinguishers.  Seriously though, anyone claiming that the Dalai Lama is a violent threat needs to re-evaluate what he or she considers a threat.  If the Buddhists are the worst the world has to fear then we’d better brace ourselves for… what?  A stern talking to?  Cause I don’t even think they would go that far.

 

I think most of the world would agree with me in saying that baseless allegations say much more about the speaker of the allegations than the target of them.


Comments:
 
sphincteria   sphincteria wrote
on 4/1/2008 10:07:02 PM
Good piece. Reads like an op-ed in Rolling Stone or put a talking head with it and run it on The Daily Show. Not that the elite pinheads who run things will recognize sarcasm and change their ways. Good timing. No awkward sentences. Fine work. (Cause I don’t even think they would go that far. -I think 'Because' instead of 'Cause'. The rest of the piece was pretty straight-line grammatically.)

jlew1973   jlew1973 wrote
on 4/1/2008 5:20:33 PM
Brief, witty, and to the point. You said volumes without wasting words, and the entertainment value was a bonus. That said, I'm not shallow, I get the serious point you're making. Thanks for posting! John

Jeremiah P
Journalism
Editorial
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Synopsis
Dalai Lama: Peaceful, or wolf in llama's clothing?
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