President Obama Murders Morty Druckler While Millions Watch in Horror

An Ode to PETA

 (The President swatted a fly which brought an outcry of cruelty from PETA.  The fly was named Morty Druckler by a cartoonist who mocked PETA's foolish reaction.)

By Elton Camp


Don’t swat that fly.

Can’t kill that mouse.

Spare the termites

In your house.


Sentient beings are they

With full right to live.

Do not you dare these betray.

Their deaths can’t forgive.


Let them feel pain?

That we so abhor!

From cruelty refrain.

They live to make more.


Animals belong not to us.

Them we must not eat.

Admit and make no fuss.

Veggies are quite a treat.


Animals used for test?

Can’t be right to do.

Let them play and rest.

They are beings too.


We hate all the evil scabs

Crooked, twisted little men

Who keep them in their labs

We free them from all that sin.


We break into such a place

Trash it with great delight

Brings an end to such disgrace

Oh how we love a fight.


A dog is not your pet.

An equal instead.

Feed, wash, and never threat

And lay him on your bed.


Nor is a cat your pet.

Allow her to run your life

She's such a fine asset.

Do not cause her strife


Leather seats in your car?

Shoes from animal skin?

All the righteous must bar.

Plastic or cloth avoid sin.


Never wear a fur coat

Lest you make us faint.

Just so you can gloat?

We will throw on paint.


Sell animals in a store?

Pen them in a cage?

Such we allow no more.

Puts us in a rage.


We love our furry, hairy friend.

Now you know the reasons why

Any slight to him must end.

For animals we’d gladly die.

For those who don’t recognize PETA, it is an animal rights group with views that many consider extreme.  Since satire is subject to being misunderstood, I’ll say plainly that I am not in sympathy with PETA.  I do, however, oppose cruelty to animals. 

Elton4562   Elton4562 wrote
on 5/23/2010 8:03:21 PM
Hey Henrietta, I'm glad the article gave you a smile. It was nice of you to take time to comment. The thing that horrifies me most about PETA is their opposition to medical use of animals. They have been reported to say, "Even if we knew a cure for AIDS would result, we'd still be against animal experimentation." By the way, I formely taught A & P for the allied medical field, although most of my students were in the RN program rather than EMT. Elton

Henrietta   Henrietta wrote
on 5/22/2010 10:32:54 PM
This is very timely for me. We just had this discussion during my EMT practical testing. One of my classmates supports PETA. Among those of us in the Silver Valley of Northern Idaho, this is not a popular position. I wish I had read this before my class. Thanks for the smile in my life.

Elton4562   Elton4562 wrote
on 5/10/2010 9:08:00 PM
Yeah, I agree. It describes PETA a bit too accurately to be good satire. Thanks for reading and commenting. Elton

KLHpensil   KLHpensil wrote
on 5/10/2010 6:05:43 PM
This is not much of a satire. Good poem, though.

writing Elton4562

Bookmark and Share

You must log in to rate.
This has not been rated.

Read about his fiendish act and the outcry it produced.