One Date

 

One Date

 

One date might be all I get, to set a good impression

Two dates if I’m lucky and the good tides are still in session

Three dates if I’m good, and do what we both know is right

And beyond that I’m doing great, and I want to hold on tight

One chance to touch your heart, to see if your for real

Two chances to miss you when we part, to miss the things we feel

Three chances to know, to understand, the real woman inside of you

Three chances to know if honor and integrity is something that you really do

One chance to kiss your lips, to feel that thrill to my fingertips

Two chances to hold you close

Three chances to take you out dancing three chances to hear my name on your lips

Three chances to let us both know

One chance is all I get, then that’s a chance I’d take

Two chances, things are looking good, she didn’t try to get rid of me

Three chances, slow down my racing heart

Three chances, I got lucky, a feeling I had from the start

Getting to know you, taking long walks in the country

Talking about something’s and a lot of nothing at all

Taking a bike ride, sitting on the porch swing

And not trying to fix things, but being there to catch you if you fall

 


Comments:
 
Bluez   Bluez wrote
on 6/12/2009 7:54:57 AM
Starling: I read your thoughts and understand, and I think your points are valid, but this one was written after a conversation with someone that used to be here, she was talking about that and said "he" would only have one chance, one date!" and those two words kept jumping out at me, so I thought, "What would I do if it was me?" But I sincerely apreciate your thoughts on my work and for taking the time to read it and comment, your a good friend

Starlingpoet   Starlingpoet wrote
on 6/12/2009 3:41:11 AM
I have a suggestion or a thought for you -not a criticism just something to think about and then you can take it or leave it -right? When I read this poem I felt like it was too busy -if that makes sense. I think you could make it softer by taking out the repeated lines. I will show you what I mean. One date might be all I get, to set a good impression Two dates if I’m lucky and the good tides are still in session Three dates if I’m good, and do what we both know is right Beyond that I’m doing great, and I want to hold on tight A chance to touch your heart, to see if your for real To miss you when we part, to miss the things we feel I want to know, and understand, the real woman inside of you Is honor and integrity something that you really do I will leave it there -I hope you understand what I am trying to say -again just my thoughts -thanks for sharing this poem with me! Full of lot's of feelings and emotions-touching.

Bluez   Bluez wrote
on 4/16/2008 9:57:23 AM
Thank you all for your kind words and thoughts, this made me feel better about what I wrote. I am also s skeptic, one of those that thinks that love was meant for everyone else, but I would not pass on that emotion, that passion and joy because of the tears that might follow. The aniticpation is what keeps me going sometimes.

debby   debby wrote
on 4/14/2008 2:32:51 PM
A lovely poem. You make love sound inviting even to the biggest skeptic. Keep posting!

justwrite   justwrite wrote
on 4/14/2008 11:51:26 AM
Ah, the sequence of dating. How heart-felt and sweetly you put it. You are a true poet. The anticipation of love is strongly portrayed in this poem. Sincerely,

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Synopsis
A friend of mine told me a phrase and it brought this to mind, I asked her and she gave me permission to post it here, and I hope you like it.
A Word from the Writer
I don't spend weeks going over a poem to try and make it perfecr, I usually write them and then walk away.
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