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I need a review of a short stories Options
#1 Posted : Sunday, December 1, 2013 4:30:50 PM
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Posts: 1
Hello. I am a budding writer from Kingston, Jamaica. I was looking at your website, and I would like to ask you if you could review a short story for me? Just please tell me what are your opinions about my story and how to improve it. That is if you are interested in my proposal??? I wait for an answer. Thanks. Paul.


Paul Bailey 7,407 Words


During the American civil war, along a remote stretch of the Mississippi, the union soldiers pursue the confederate rebels. In the process they come upon the relics of a long abandoned and forgotten civilization and more strangely a crashed alien space craft. How could a place like this exist for so long without anyone finding out? Well the union soldiers are about to find out that they are not alone and is about to come upon and encounter a terror like no other. Mutated Indians with space technology caught in a time vortex, same place but different dimension. This all transpired in Caney Fork River near modern day Sylva, NC. A giant was thought to have come from another dimension, when his or their ship crashed. The crashed spaceship is like a shrine to the Indians, and the abode of the giant who still lives and controls these mutated zombies. The union soldiers are about to clash with a supernatural enemy; they will have an unlikely ally; confederate troops from the surrounding area.

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Gunshots echoed across the valley. The sounds of explosions and cannon fire rippled through the Caney Fork River valley. The year, May 1865; the event the closing stages of the civil war between the Confederate or secessionist states of the southern United States and the northern union states. The remnant of the confederate forces battle with the northern invaders. It was a battle that the confederates would surely loose, however not without one last stand to defend their land and heritage.
The spring thaw gives way to warm temperatures, and it was the warmest spring in decades. A glorious time for a force facing the final death jabs.
A very long time ago something crashed on the territory of the Chatti Indians on the current location. Indian legends have it that moons ago, long before the coming of the white man, there was war in the heavens{meaning there was war going on another distant planet}, a war between gods. According to Indian folklore, a god escaping the carnage of the battle on his home planet, crashed on earth on Indian land in North America. With him an enormous space craft with fantastic
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technology. The Indians reported that this being from another planet was called `sokash`, meaning great one. This was because again according to Indian folklore, he was a giant. He was taller than any man known at the time-unbelievably taller. Standing at ten feet, and wielding fantastic supernatural powers, he was worshipped as a god by the Cani Indians-a
branch of the Chatty Indians. For generations he was worshipped by them, of which he held them with magical suspense and powers, to do anything on his twisted behalf. This giant would demand human sacrifice and macabre and ritualistic vices in exchange for technology and the promise of immortal life. This was an evil being would realised that he found a planet where there would not be much resistance against him. The tribe thougrougly hypnotised by him, sold their soul to the devil. Not all however would go along with the plan. A most powerful shaman opposed the beast, and a great spiritual battle ensued, however the giant lost and was banished into another dimension along with almost all the tribe. This giant is waiting for the day, when he can return with his army of immortal Indian braves and terrifying supernatural powers. He was imprisoned in his own spaceship and made to disappear from view. Soon with the war approaching, he will be re-awakened at the expense of tremendous bloodshed and ritualistic sacrifice that war also
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brings. The ship of the crashed giant buried and covered supernaturally by an ancient and powerful shaman, will be re-animated as the war comes closer to it. It thrives on sacrifice and bloodletting and the giant and his ship is about to get it.
As the Union army battalion, pushed further into the valley, resistance got much stiffer and brutal. The confederate forces or ‘rebels’ as they were called, employed guerrilla tactics to slow the advance of the federal forces. Constantly loosing men in a slow war of attrition, Captain Neil Parkingham, the regimen commander decided to launch a
full frontal assault, supported by artillery. It was during this battle that stray shells would land on where the ancient space craft crashed and the giant inside entombed in it would be awakened for as the confederates retreated into the dense and isolated woods, cliffs, marshes and valleys of that area, the blood of fallen confederate soldiers would feed the craft buried under dense shrubs and sand and powerful projectiles would somehow explode directly on the craft and trigger the rejuvenation of the ships molecular capabilities. This would in turn awaken the giant and a long buried terror with it.
“Lieutenant Matheson, we have 100 men, lets advance on the rebels through that deep gorge over there,” said Captain Parkhingham, “we got the bastards are on the run.”
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“Sir, the rebels are pushing back into the forest. This is unchartered territory, we do not know the terrain,” said Lieutenant Matheson. “We could be opening ourselves up for a trap,” he bellowed.
However, Captain Parkingham would have none of it. The heat of battle and the excitement of the chase caught him up in a hollowed frenzy.
“We should wait for backup sir, we have no idea of their troop strength,” said the lieutenant.
“I have an intuition about these things. An old warrior like me,” he ushered. “They are finished. Chase them into oblivion as we pursue or glory,” the general ushered.
Caney Fork River basin was a foreboding place at that time. It was an extremely isolated place mired in legends and superstitions. Old Indian campsites and burial grounds dotted
the landscape. There were no maps of the area which was the size of the island of Cuba. One hundred Union soldiers entered the Caney Fork valley in hot pursuit of the renegade Confederate soldiers. Lieutenant Matheson had strong reservations about such a foolhardy attack based on raw impulse, but it was Captain Parkingham who had the last word and gave the orders.
“Lead the charge Sergeant Jackson,” said the Captain.

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Sergeant Jackson, a tall strapping sturdy fellow with reddish blond hair of Scottish descent responded;”lets chase the rascals to hell and end the war.”
However, a new and more brutal war is about to begin that will shake the soul of every fighter on both sides to their foundation.

As the Federal forces pressed on after the southern rebels, they encountered extremely thick and dense marshes and an extensive network of river systems hidden in a lush but seemingly uninhabited. The Confederate troops trying to escape with their lives and making a last stance for land and honour stumbled upon this lush valley and were quite surprised by what they discovered. They have never had it on their maps, since they all originated much further north in Virginia, this was also strange territory for them.
“How could it be possible that we know not of this strange and alluring place,” said Confederate Captain Joshua Harrison. “This is a massive valley-how could it not show on any maps.” He said.

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His lieutenant Isaac Bolt ushered these words, “it is not uncommon for many places to be totally undiscovered and isolated. All this area has been Indian Territory for thousands of years. This is a vast continent sir, many mysteries lie await to be discovered,” he said.
The Caney Fork river valley would be perfect for ambushes and guerrilla attacks of which the Confederate army are known to possess great skill. The consensus among the rebels ‘create as much havoc as possible on the pursuing union troops as possible before they are all killed or taken prisoner’. However, something dark and unworldly is about to take hold of them. A supernatural force from beyond their realm is about to strike with horrific precision and hellish fury. Gunshots and explosions echoed across the valley as the ‘Yanks’ gave hot chase. The rebels used snipers to slow the advance of the union troops—forcing a battle of attrition, trying to pick them off one by one. As the fighting continued deeper and deeper into the unchartered mysterious zone, they approached a huge but dry river bed. It is here that the ancient space craft is long buried along with the powerful and evil extraterrestrial visitor. The confederates found it quite unusual that they would come upon a dry river bed in a wet and luscious valley, but as union artillery rained down on them
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their main objective is to escape with their lives. As the bombs and bullets fell on the rebel remnant many would take cover on the huge sand embankment covering the spacecraft, but the gush of blood would overflow and saturate the unnoticed monument around the fallen craft. It is this massive blood flow that would awaken the evil visitor.
“There seems to be another valley just on the horizon which could offer us some protection from this onslaught-let us try to reach it,” said Confederate Sergeant Maxwell Jackson.
“Quickly to the covered valley below,” ordered rebel Captain Harrison.
“We have them in our sights Captain Parkingham, “said Union lieutenant Matheson.” This last great battle is soon coming to an end.”
“Onward charge” said captain Parkingham. “Sergeant Gibson round them up and let’s go home”.
The intensity of the battle was murderous. It has been a very long time since so much blood had been shed on that hallowed spot. It would not go unnoticed, but a great mystery was about to be unleashed upon the warring factions; it would cause them
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to unite into one force as Americans against this gigantic evil in their midst.

As the rebel troops fled from the advancing federal soldiers, they run towards what they thought was another lower valley with low lying hills where probably they could make their final stand. As they fled into the other lower lying valley they encountered something that would totally mystify and bewildered them. As they went deeper into this ‘new valley’, they began to realize that this was no ordinary natural formation. What they thought were hills were actually giant pyramid like structures. Confederate lieutenant Isaac Bolt, who himself was a well read and learnt man, recognized what the structures might have been. It was a sight to behold. It was a magnificent and colossal complex of huge pyramids and pyramid shaped structures, surrounded by giant trees on every side as well as what seemed to be massive canals and a large airfield; but an airfield for what?
“By the grace of the gods, what have we stumbled upon-what is this place and who built it?” Captain Harrison asked.

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“Could the Indians have done this-if so where are the people-where did everyone go?”
Everyone was held spellbound by what they had stumbled upon.
“There is much mystery to the history of this land; the native peoples have always stated that their cultures were influenced to a large degree by superhuman cultures and technology from far away,” said lieutenant Bolt.
“What do you mean by ‘far away‘, Mr Bolt,” said Captain Harrison.
“Well sir from the Mayans and Aztecs as well as the Toltec, they have all claimed they were helped and inspired by visitors from other realms,” replied Bolt. “What other reason could there be to explain this most breathtaking discovery.”
As the rebel troops quickly moved through the gigantic complex, a shout of urgency and dread rippled and echoed through the majestic courtyard.
“Yanks, yanks-they are almost upon us,” shouted Sergeant Jackson, as his words in a strange and echoing sound, ricocheting off the walls of the huge pyramids in a haunting fashion.
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The bullets were not far behind though as the Union army was hot on their heels. They took to foot and tried to hide in the vast complex of pyramids. The union soldiers were also taken aback with great astonishment as to what they have stumbled upon. Captain Parkingham looked on in a totally bewildered fashion. They were all wondering what they had encountered and what awaited them. However, in the heat of battle the taste of blood took precedence. The Union troops pursued the Confederates right into the alien courtyard to deliver the final deathblow. The rebels took cover amid the trees and edifices and the final battle began-or so they thought.

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The Confederates and the Union army[or at least the remnants of them], square off, in what might prove to be the very last battle of the American civil war, and how monumental it would prove to be even if only in a most eerie and horrific sense. All were amazed at what they have come upon.
Then suddenly, out of the dark mist of the valley, came a most unusual sight. An old Indian chief approached them as they were about to square off one last time in murderous rage. It was an almost surreal image as he split them right down the middle and parted the Americans in a supernatural scene that could be equated to the biblical account of Moses parting the Red Sea. All the combatants were fixed on this old Indian as the mist swirled around him in an almost mystical sense. It was as if they were seeing with the ‘mind’s eye. As the Indian approached, all were held in a state of supernatural suspense, as if they were rooted to the ground they stood.
The old Indian bellowed in a deep almost menacing voice-
“Oh you the others, the outlanders, you have trod on sacred ground. Grounds of the sacred valley, the valley beyond the shadows, where the great one dwells and the tribe of mist sleeps.”
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The Americans split between north and south in a vicious five year struggle and in a final great struggle, stood face to face not firing bullets, but bewildered, lost and terrified because of a world they stumbled upon that was right under their radar, but trapped in an alternate dimension. They were quite surprised that the old Indian spoke English. As a result of this the Union Captain Parkingham, asked this question-
“I am Captain Nelson Parkingham of the United States army, who are you-how come you speak English so well-what is this place?”
“My name is among the ancient ones, the ones of old, the Chatti and our overseer from the stars. I know who you are. The white man comes from afar as well, destroy the Indian and his way of life, now you destroy each other; but it is you who will be vanquished as the fog of the river valley vanishes with the rise of the sun. You have stumbled upon your end,” hauntingly said the Indian.
The Confederate captain Harrison then said-
“What freakishness is this; I have grown up around an area not too far from here, and I have never been to or heard of this strange place. Who built these grand monuments and

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what were they used for-what is the name of your tribe, and who is your chief?”
“Hahahaah,” with a frightening laugh and grin said the old Indian. “Your time is soon up; woe to all that transgress the land of my father-the outlanders will vanish as the morning dew-to be no more.”
“Who is your father and where are we and where everyone else is,” violently screamed both captains.
“Listen Indian we will string you up and hang you out to rot on a pole of a union flagstaff-where are we and what is this place,” furiously screamed captain Parkhingham.
Then as suddenly and as mysteriously as he came the old Indian vanished in the unusual mist of the valley in which they the American armies found themselves; the old Indian vanished and let off a screeching cry and menacing laugh that put everyone in a total state of horrific fear. It was at that moment that they all forgot that they were fighting each other and then suddenly once the Indian vanished they turned the guns on each other. A standoff ensued in which in a jolt of serious confusion and overwhelming fear, they turned on each other.

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“Wait, wait, let’s discuss the predicament that we are in,” said union Captain Matheson. “Please listen. The south has lost the war for all intents and purpose, which is the reality confronting you. In the end we are all Americans and we maybe confronting an evil more dangerous than anything we have come across so far.”
“What are you talking about, you are a yellow yank-I fight to the very end,” said rebel sergeant Jackson.
“Sergeant Jackson the yank maybe right, we have lost the war, let’s face the music and move on. In the end as he said, we are all Americans,” said rebel captain Harrison.
“Let’s put down the guns, and go out gracefully with dignity. We may have lost the war, but our culture and traditions will remain intact, in wait for another time and day when our glorious south will rise again,” eloquently uttered by Captain Harrison.
Then he said to the union soldiers-
“You can take our guns, but you can’t take our land.”
“For now you can keep your guns-let’s find a way to get out of here. We may still have some fighting yet, but with a different more terrifying enemy,” said Captain Parkhingham.
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“I have a dark feeling deep in my gut that we will come up against an irresistible force, something we are just not prepared for but will have to overcome.”
With all that said, they proceeded to find a way out of that eerie place, but everywhere they turned, they were followed by an invisible feeling of dread. Everyone was tormented or showing signs of torment and dementia. They were all going in circles and could not find their way out. Their compasses were not working correctly; they had no maps of this area and as a result had to rely on memory, but when they went back the same way they came, they ended up in a different spot. Fear, confusion and dread set in; however that was not the only thing that set it. A tremendous lightening storm and the thick darkness that came with it forced everyone to scamper for cover. They went inside the only place they could; into a pyramid. The storm was unreal, as if whipped up by the hand of an unseen force. Whatever evil power that ruled that dimension, would make sure no one would leave.

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As the terrible thunder and lightning storm along with thick and menacing darkness covered the land the valley thereof, the Americans sought refuge in one of the very large and mysterious pyramids. It was completely dark inside, like the darkness of a hundred generations-thick and filled with the smell of fear. The American captain in possession of a torch, lit it and in the process said these words-
“This crypt, bounded for untold generations and lay obscured in darkness for that long, I wonder what horrors or glory we will awaken behind these mysterious walls.”
“Yes captain Parkingham, it seems as if the darkness speaks with a deafening roar. It seems no one has been in this moseleaum for very long time, or no one has lived to tell about it,” replied Confederate Captain Harrison.
As the soldiers moved ever deeper into the pyramid, their trepidation grew to fever pitched proportions.

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‘What will they encounter in these dark dungeons‘, they asked themselves. ‘Who built this place and how did it remain undiscovered and hidden from view for so long.’
As suddenly as they thought, with equal rapidity, they came upon a very large circular room with graven images of statues representing strange humanoids figures and equally frightening effigies of unknown animals. They approached the large room atop by step and found unlit torches that they promptly lit and alas-the place was illuminated with the torchlight of a long bygone and horrific era. All were astounded at what they had stumbled upon, but yet came another even bigger cavern just below the chamber of statues:
“Lieutenant Harrison, you are somewhat of an expert on history and ancient history at that, what do you make of these unusual objects and this place all together?” Asked captain Parkingham.
“The large statue seems to be of a quite large human somehow, but yet I have never encountered such a creature even in all my travels even in Asia. The animals seem to be quite unusual as well. I have never seen such species before. Whoever built these pyramids, seemed to be deeply into the religion of animism,” he replied.
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“May I interject sir?” asked Confederate Sergeant Maxwell Jackson. “I was born and raised about fifty miles from here, I grew up around many Indians and I have always heard about hidden and mysterious kingdoms lost in time and mist from ancient times. I never knew that this place existed even in my wildest dreams and I come from a place not too far from here. The Indians call these places ‘valleys of the giants’ and being guarded by mysterious illusionary technology to hide them from outsiders.”
“I too have heard of these legends, of civilizations built by the gods and protected by strange forces and the Indians themselves,” interjected Confederate Lieutenant Bolt.
Then said lieutenant Matheson forcefully-
“If that be the truth, then we have stumbled upon one of the greatest historical discoveries of the modern era.”
Then said Captain Harrison of the Confederate army-
“If that is also true, then we know for certain why it was so difficult to find this place.”
Then suddenly, arose a mighty shout from one of the American soldiers-
“Gentlemen, gentlemen, sir come have a look at this.”
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It was a deeper chamber below and much bigger that was come upon. However, it was a most horrific and disturbing discovery and sight.
“Now I know why no one ever mentioned this place, they never lived to tell about it,” sombrely stated Captain Parkingham.
It was a giant graveyard of bones and human remains. It measured into the thousands going back many hundreds of years. It was a ritual temple of sacrifice-human sacrifice.
“There are human remains here stretching back to the time of the first settlers of America-look, over there-there are Viking weapons and over there, Spanish and French insignia. Also I see pottery from what must have been from the days of the earliest pilgrims,” stated Matheson.
“No wonder there have been ancient stories of entire groups of peoples and explorers gone missing totally without a trace-many have ended up here-British, Spanish, French, Americans, Vikings and other Indians as well-but slaughtered by whom, by what force,” Captain Harrison said.
“That statue, the big statue depicting that strange human, I think that must have been their god and master that all these unfortunate souls were sacrificed to. The Incas,
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Mayas and Aztecs all performed human sacrifices to their gods who were all thought to originate from some distant world,” replied Lieutenant Matheson.
“Utter nonsense, there is a perfectly rational explanation for all of this lads-I don’t believe in beings coming from other dimensions or worlds and forming civilizations. There is a practical explanation for this phenomenon I say,” Captain Parkingham uttered.
Then said Lieutenant Bolt in a totally shocked voice-
“Where are the Indians? How could they just disappear who killed these people and store their bones and remains inside this sepulchre of horrors? Are we next?”
All looked around in terrified bewilderment, for what raged outside was no mere storm, but the awakening of an ancient terror and the embodiment of pure evil.

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Then with sudden terror and swiftness, thick blackness engulfed them. Fear and mayhem overcame them and there was no answer for all the madness. The darkness of the storm dug deep down into their souls. It was not just a physical enemy that they would come up against or even a supernatural terror, but they will also be in battle against their own personal abyss. It was also a battle for the soul and the mind. The darkness filled their entire being which led to their own inner demons to rise to the surface. Every man paralyzed with fear and tormented by his own devils. They began to turn on each other, totally forgetting that they were under siege by very powerful and malignant forces.
“Take control of yourselves men,” screamed Captain Parkingham, “we are turning against each other-whatever we are fighting wants us to exactly do in order to weaken us.”
Things were getting g out of control and the men were as if possessed by an unseen force-not under their own control. The savagery continued and the Americans turned against themselves-against their brothers in arms, for just as it seemed that they were beginning to forge a union regardless of
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culture and politics, they began to break apart in murderous fashion. Suddenly, something quite inexplicable happened. There was a great rumble and a great door opened, and then appeared an old Indian man, much to the amazement of the totally bewildered and under-sieged soldiers. All was literally stuck to the ground they stood; they all though this was the end. Thick darkness had engulfed them and they thought ‘where did this Indian come from and what would he do?’
The old Indian man spoke no word, he lift up his hand and his staff and uttered few unintelligible words in an unknown language and alas, the thick darkness disappeared and tormented the soldiers no more. Everyone came back to their senses and had wondered what was happening. The old Indian disappeared into an opening just as suddenly as he came. It was then that the Americans realized that he must have been a good Indian-which seemed to have been sent to assist them. It seemed that the Americans had gotten renewed strength in the face of great opposition.
“If that Indian had not come along, we would have been history,” said Captain Parkhingham.

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“You are right indeed about that, but just look through that opening in the wall,” said Captain Harrison frantically, “we are under attack by an army of Indians.”
Out of the dark and thundering mist, came an army of ghost warriors. From the count of the Americans, at least 500 braves like a spectre of a bygone era. To the horror of all who witnessed, something hovered above them like a terrifying menace; it was the giant of old, the space father, the alien menace who turned these peaceful Indians into demonic freaks and who intends also on taking not just the lives of the American soldiers, but also to devour their souls. The Americans however, will fight to the very end to defend their honour and their land. Albeit, can they defeat a space alien with tremendous technological and spiritual weaponry? In general they are much more highly armed than the Indians and would probably win in a direct confrontation, but the Indians seemed to have weapons that were beyond their technological capabilities-where did they get it? Obviously from the alien invader who will also join in the battle.
“Spread out-spread out,” cried Captain Parkhingham. “Try to get to the outer embankments, go to the left group one and group two spread to the right.”
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Sixty men formed out in three defensive positions with great fury and urgency with the mutated Indians in hot pursuit. A full charge was led on all fronts, with the alien himself hovering above firing off explosives made of a kind of blitz and exploded with great intensity and destroyed everything in its path. The battle was on and the Americans opened up with all that they had. Indians were falling all over the battlefield, but there were too many Indian braves to fight and it seemed as if they would be overrun. Captains Parkingham and Harrison led their troops quite valiantly and with their rifles and cannons, inflicted serious damage on the enemy, but they suffered a major loss when both Captain Harrison and Lieutenant Bolt fell in the heat of battle. This left Captain Parkingham in sole charge and he led his troops that were held up in the pyramid to fall back to a high ridge just outside the pyramid. Sergeant Jackson took over from Captain Harrison and led the fight to the end. Not only were the soldiers fighting the demonic Indians warriors on the ground, but they had to also defend themselves from the alien hover craft firing high explosives of a kind never seen before at them causing massive destruction to their formations, and soldiers who were unfortunate enough to be left seriously wounded on the battlefield, their bowels were ripped open with
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what were long flaming swords and their intestines and inner parts ripped out and scattered over the battlefield; the soldiers who were captured were sent to the back lines where their skins were ripped off while alive all this while they were strapped to the sides of the low formation hill pyramid just behind the lines, where they were engulfed in a kind of ritualistic torture in which their brains were removed and transplanted with a kind of crude device that made them aware, but the with the predisposition of a zombie. This was known because scouts were sent out from the American army to search for possible exit routes and they did not return and were later spotted by other scouts destroyed in grizzly fashion. Maybe that is what is driving the zombie like Indians who were attacking mercilessly, all this without fear or pain/they just charged murderously. It seemed they were already dead, only given life by artificial means/maybe by the technology of their alien overlord. This was realised by Captain Harrison when one of his cannons blasted a formation of these creatures and what he realised was they were composite like/meaning they had no human cerebra and their spine was metallic. It seemed that the alien overlord was using human body parts for a long time for his own ‛special purposes’. They were actually facing cyborgs.
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As the battle raged on, the Americans were on their last leg; they had lost 70% of their manpower and were low on ammunition.
“What should we do now sir,” a soldier said to Captain Harrison. “We are low on ammunition and we have lost most of our troops.”
“I don’t know, we must draw back to the outer line,” shouted frantically Captain Harrison. “Let us pull back and rejoin forces with Captain Parkhingham-if we can.”
A flare was set off, and it was a sign to regroup in one spot to continue in this most epic and terrible battle, all the while taking fire from this great serpent-the extraterrestrial giant who was attacking them with great fury all the way. The craft hovered overhead with the sound of screaming thunder and the wailing of hundred banshees; it kept glowing with a fluorescent glow of fire often red like on fire. Her canons were like lightening when fired, with the sound of thunder in the background-kept in a state of levitation by an unknown power. The almost primitive weapons of the American army could not even make a dent into the armour when fired at the thing that is whenever they managed to get a shot off in the first instance. The soldiers were
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filled with absolute dread and terror as well as total bewilderment as to what they were witnessing and facing before their very eyes, the greatest army in the world at the moment, who could not even adequately defend themselves in any reasonable fashion against this murderous threat from another dimension. They had no clue, they were awe and terror struck.
As the space craft circled around to make one final blow to the soldiers, [God help those who got captured, a swift death would have been far merciful}, they all gathered around to face the hoards of rampaging and attacking Indians. They had managed to kill many, but their efforts would prove just to fall way too short of anything enduring. The hounds of hell gathered around in fatal fury. The remnants of the American army took refuge behind a huge mould that had been won away by time-it was actually a derelict but much smaller pyramid, which provided a short but somewhat excellent cover against the rampaging army of mutant cyborgs.
“Where is Captain Parkingham?” asked Harrison. “Has he fallen against this enemy?”
“I am afraid so Captain Harrison,” responded a soldier, “Sergeant Bolt is also dead.”
“So who is in charge soldier,” asked Captain Harrison.
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“No one sir,” he responded sombrely and quite abashed, “we just fight on without a superior until we all expire.”
They were in all actuality on the very brink of being exterminated. All gathered around in a circle while shielding behind the mould of a collapsed pyramid on top of a natural embankment. As the enemy closed in for the kill, something strange happened. The old Indian that the soldiers met before the battle reappeared. This man seemed to defy gravity and just kept on approaching us in this calm serene ease that totally transfixed everyone and held us all in a sense of suspended animation. The Indian exuded a kind of latent energy that none could resist. It was a very odd phenomenon indeed. He dropped a big bag, {which he seemed to carry with easy considering how huge it was}; he dropped it right in front of them, smiled and walked away while projectiles from the mutants rifles, -a strange laser like bullet that left a huge gaping hole in anything it hit seemed to go around him, as if being protected by an invisible force field-. As we opened the bag there were three types of what seemed to be weapons, but nothing of the time or era. One was clearly a bomb with a strange timer made of symbols and it seemed that with each passing minute, the symbols become less, meaning what happens when there are no more symbols? Somehow, by some unusual,
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telepathic and intuitive means that by someway supernaturally a voice was speaking to Captain Harrison and he just knew instinctive and intuitively that that device was immensely destructive and when the symbols stopped, all hell would break loose. The other weapon was like a special type of gun which somehow the captain knew could be used to bring down the craft hovering ahead. The third weapon was a type of machine gun-similar to a `Gatling` that could be used against the onrushing formation of the enemy. It seemed as if somehow time had slowed down for the remaining troops got the gun together and started to use it against the Indians to devastating effect. They were mowed down in horrific fashion by this terrible weapon. Seeing what was happening, the giant inside his ship counter attacked furiously, but the captain fired off the strange but powerful gun and managed to hit the ship, which immediately developed mechanical difficulties and crashed to the ground.
The giant immediately emerged from his destroyed ship with great wrath and began to lead the attack on the ground himself. It was a gigantic and frightening figure that left the humans awestruck with terror. Of the sixty men that started the battle, only seven remained. Captain Harrison instructed his men to try to make a run for it.
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“Make a run for it men,” he said, “I will try to hold them off with this weapon and you can fight your way out with the machine gun. This device is some form of explosive that might be able to destroy the entire complex and this creature with it.”
“God speed,” he said and fired off round after round against the giant and his hordes; the rest of the men fled firing in all directions. Most were cut down in the process but only one managed to escape the alien complex when mysteriously he stumbled upon a pale white horse and `rode him like a bat out of hell`, all the time taking fire from the hostiles.

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As the Indian attacked the American soldiers, there was a terrifying cry to charge the battle lines of those who stumbled upon them. Hundreds of mutated, zombie like spectres launched a murderous attack upon the besieged soldiers held up in one of the pyramids.
The soldiers led a final desperate and bloody charge against the oncoming horde. Captain Parkingham made the charge against the blood thirsty Indian onslaught. The remnants of the American army were overwhelmed, but their new super gun, made them somewhat highly efficient in slaughtering the diabolic menace. Although soldiers were falling left right and centre, further depleting the small numbers of soldiers remaining, the Americans were destroying the enemy and leaving a small narrow, bloody col de sac in which to escape. Suddenly, out of nowhere, the soldiers stumbled upon some horses and two carriages of which they without delay and with utter conviction used in their escape bid, all the while, dodging enemy fire. But there was one last shot to be fired on the part of Parkingham and his fleeing men: the huge cannon like gun was placed at the back of the fleeing horse drawn wagon: Captain Parkingham aimed meticulously as the space
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craft hovered in the dark, smoke blackened sky, as the craft was turning around, he softly, (without knowing exactly how to use the weapon, but attempting for a lucky shot anyway), he aimed and as the craft was about to fire off a salvo, the captain fired first;
“Swoosh,” was the sound. A great swoosh.
A great blinding light went forth and temporarily blinded all around. A great crashing sound was heard and Captain Parkhingham was wondering if he had hit the target. The escaping convoy had reached a somewhat far distant from the fighting, but a huge black smoke could be seen emanating from where the craft was hit and went down in a fiery heap.
“Hahaha, eeeh...eeeh,” was heard all around the retreating troops, as they knew they had taken down the alien craft.
Oddly it seemed as they were still in the act of fleeing for dear life, the atmosphere changed; it seemed as if they were somehow transplanted to another dimension and time. A thick white mist descended on them as they ventured further away from the alien complex. But what was it actually¬? It seemed they had entered another time zone-a twilight zone. They were not being pursued anymore; as quickly as lightening
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it had seemed the nightmare had stopped. But was it really so? However, suddenly, they remember Captain Harrison, and they bemoaned him, grieved and wept over him. They knew he would not escape the carnage.
Captain Harrison, alone, desperate and about to go out in a blaze of glory. The ship may have crashed, but the menace remained. The evil alien giant emerged from the smouldering wrecked as Harrison watched in sheer terror and bewilderment. He had thought it was the end, but it was the beginning of a new wave of terror. A dimensional door had opened, and the alien creature was regrouping and it seemed, summoning fresh forces from his universe, for many creatures came out of this wormhole, terrifying and horrifying to behold, ready to wreak havoc on mere mortals. This being was hell bent on causing destruction and it seemed was planning for a major offensive in real time...the real world...the newly formed nation called the United States and all within its borders, at least at first-and quite probably annihilation on a global scale. The creature was filled with rage and it was about to vent it. Captain Harrison with all his years of military experience and service had acquired a six sense somewhat for sensing danger and imminent catastrophe. There was a deep red coloured button on the alien object-of what seemed to be somewhat of a timer
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and the captain sensed it was a kind of an explosive device. The blood red button beckoned to him, like a strong nightmare that could not be forgotten. He knew it was now or never, knowing that his own life would be snuffed out but in his mind he would be putting an end to a great and vile presence in the earth.
He pressed the button and suddenly it set off a chain reaction of sharp sunlight type light. He was engulfed by this menacing light, almost as if the light itself was alive, moving around in swirls. The creature and its scions also noticed great dread in the air. The captain rushed out into the midst and throng of the gathered and charged the vile threat. The giant seeing this ominous object of destruction, with great rapidity rushed towards the oncoming man on a mission along with its devilish troops. Both clashed into one another, one on a path to create destruction of the known world, and the other to save it. As the two sides met in the middle, a great collision occurred, and it was over as soon as it started. The explosive detonated; a great white flash resembling a massive lighting strike flashed all the way to the distant beyond. An explosion of enormous and biblical proportions rippled through the alien complex and beyond. So powerful was the explosion, that Captain Parkhingham's troops
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miles in the distant hills were almost blinded and were dashed from their transport like being hit directly by a powerful hurricane. The trees around them swayed back and forth, many were uprooted and dashed against them like artillery shells, along with innumerable stones big and small. A fierce heat and great force hit them to the ground as they tried to get on their feet. They had to seek shelter in caves and under rocks to escape imminent death. As the chaos subsided, and they troops looked back into the distant horizon, what they saw greatly terrified them. Lightning storms raged in the distance. An enormous, black mushroom like cloud hovered over the distant complex of pyramids, seeing there were no pyramids left. It was complete carnage; a destructive force never before seen in the world and probably will never be seen again? Destruction on an unbelievable scale; the team was awestruck by what they were witness to.
“What happened, and what would be the outcome of all of this?” They thought to themselves.
One thing was for sure, the alien threat along with his army of clones and zombies were eliminated. They were completely destroyed and incinerated in the violent explosion, and their portals evaporated into the fabric of time and space. So was Captain Harrison.
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“He sacrificed his life for the greater good of his men, and country. He paid the highest price imaginable for the preservation of freedom, and along the way extirpated an unimaginable evil,” said Captain Parkhingham, addressing his ramshackled men.
“Do not weep for him my friends,” said Parkhingham, “he has done more for us than anyone could ever accomplish. His memory will live on in the annals of history, as the vanquisher of the dark one. This most horrifying of events has proven a kind of blessing for us, in that we have had a victory, all be it a pyrrhic one, but it has united brothers that were once sworn enemies. Let us unite and put aside our differences to face common threats to our existence as men and as Americans.” Standing on a ridge, they looked on yonder at the dark, fiery and black smoke filled smouldering wasteland, wondering if it was the end of the of the alien menace; wondering if their future will be as dark as the foreboding setting.

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